Believe it or not, there was reality TV to recap this week. In the wake of American Idol's Judge-gate 2012, things are focused laser tight on the flagship talent show. In case you've been living under a rock (i.e., work full-time) there's some major restructuring going on at the judge's bench.
Steven Tyler and a number of his cohorts are getting the boot. You can rest easy and loosen your grip on those heart pills though, because we won't concern ourselves with that galvanizing news today. Instead, we've got the Idol caravan's stop in Portland, a new edition of The Whiniest Weight-Loss Contestant, and some more ill-advised dates with The Bachelor.
Grilling with Conda
This week on The Biggest Loser, the Red and Black teams suffered an Aqua invasion. The Chicago brother-sister duo earn their way back into the competition with immunity to boot. Predictably, not everyone is thrilled about this development. That is to be expected.
Conda, however, takes things to a whole new level. This chick is a one-woman terrorist cell of psychological warfare. Within a matter of hours Adrian is deemed persona non grata in the Red Team's inner circle thanks to Conda's gossip and insinuations. It all comes to a head when beloved Red Team mascot Nancy gets the boot and Adrian speaks his mind about the decision.
In all honesty, that was quite possibly the dumbest thing he could do at that point from a Machiavellian perspective, but I'm not sure I'd fare much better after several days and nights of nonstop Conda torture. The icing on the cake is Conda's whopping two-pound weight loss. Somebody sink this girl's life preserver.
Keep Idol Weird
It goes without saying that American Idol's trip to one of the nation's weirdest cities would result in some, er, weirdos. From snot-spraying Lady Gaga crooners to gentle giants, we had it all this week.
The most interesting find was without a doubt Jermaine Jones. Standing at just over 6'8" tall and nearly incapacitated by stage fright, Jones gives an old Luther Vandross tune a treatment befitting his size. Randy Jackson says it best when he exclaims, "The Gentle Giant goes to Hollywood!"
The other promising hopeful of the evening is 21-year-old Brittany Zika. With Coke-bottle glasses and coordination to match, Brittany has all the earmarks of another basement-dwelling Idol hopeful, but she wows everyone with her effervescent version of "The Story," leading Jennifer Lopez to label her's one of the prettiest voices featured yet on the program.
Gatos y Perros
The title of this section is in reference to the howler of the week, as Ben tells Nicki its "raining gatos" during a romantic walk through Puerto Rican streets. Apparently he didn't know what "dogs" was in Spanish, so I've provided him with the answer above.
In other news, Courtney continues to use "dat bod" to get what she wants. Her brilliant plan this week? Skinny dipping! Ever the good Catholic, Ben gets his knickers in a knot shortly before they come off altogether and the two frolic in the waves. This leads to a whole lot of vague answers from Ben when the other girls start pestering him about their status in his heart. You have to give the guy credit; he's got it locked up when it comes to shut-down lines, relying on a lot of talk about "deep connections" and the like.
