Pomp and Incompetence
"The average college graduate now leaves school $27,000 in debt. The good news is they're more than qualified to work as financial advisers at J.P. Morgan." (The Tonight Show with Jay Leno)
First They Came for the Lakers...
"I was watching that new cable show where they ask what would you do if you saw someone in trouble. They were these guys getting shoved around, getting bullied. And a huge group of people were cheering them on; no one tried to stop them. Then I realized I was watching Oklahoma City beat the Lakers." (The Tonight Show with Jay Leno)