SkimIt
The Season 5 premiere of True Blood brings new characters and the return of some friendly faces -- most notably Tara, who is brought back to "life" as a bloodsucker! It's been one bloody summer since we last checked in on the good people of Bon Temps, but besides leaving behind some messy clean-ups, it's the plot lines that really need some spring-cleaning.
I'm a Survivor
True Blood is starting to compete with Game of Thrones, in the amount of side plot lines and new characters they introduce within one episode. Here's the latest body count from last season to bring you up to speed: Crazy Debbie got blown away, authority leader Nan Flanagan got dusted and wolf packmaster Marcus got put in the ground, along with Lafayette's (Nelsan Ellis) love, Jesus, and Tara is suffering from a massive bullet wound to the head.
Lust Potion Number 9
With the polyamorous arrangement of Bill (Stephen Moyer), Sookie (Anna Paquin) and Eric (Alexander Skarsgård) behind us, that leaves Eric with a new lady love in his life, his "sister" (Lucy Griffiths), who shows up after saving him and Bill from the Vampire Authority, who captured them after the whole witch debacle. Another bromance is in the works, when former Christian cult-leader Steve Newlin (Michael McMillian) shows up on Jason's (Ryan Kwanten) doorstep, and later comes out of the coffin to proclaim his love for the half-naked Jason. Luckily for Jason, his maker / friend with benefits Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) shows up to claim him as her own. But despite her outward ownership, this girl just wants to have fun. And by fun, I mean play Rock Band with college coeds, gawd.
We Need to Talk About Tara
Besides dealing with, at this point, an astronomical carpet cleaning bill, Sookie and Lafayette are struggling to deal with Tara's (Rutina Wesley) death. And in true Pet Sematary fashion, they attempt to revive her, utilizing the healing vampire powers of Pam (Kristin Bauer van Straten) -- who manages to look very open-grave chic in her matching Wal-Mart sweat suit.
Pack Politics
Now that the witches are out of the picture, this season looks like it's going to get a whole lot hairier, with major fallout among two wolf packs after Alcide (Joe Manganiello) and Sam (Sam Trammell) took out pack leader Marcus. When Marcus's mother and the pack track down Sam, he gets to witness a delightful funeral rite that includes cannibalism and some mother-son bonding.
With a cast of new characters (hello Noel from Felicity!) and some old enemies bubbling back up, the power shift of Season 5 will certainly be an interesting one. Will Tara turn the tables and terrorize the town of Bon Temps? When will Russell Edgington (Denis O'Hare) turn back up? And most importantly, who's going to get naked?
Best Lines:
"There's dirt in my bra."
--Pam, irritated with her task.
"B___h took a bullet for you."
--Lafayette to Sookie, on Tara's sacrifice.
"I finally have the strength to say, I'm a gay vampire American."
--Steve Newlin coming out to Jason.
"I am wearing a Wal-Mart sweatshirt for y'all. If that's not a demonstration of team spirit, I don't know what is."
--Pam, joking before being buried with Tara.
"But we were rocking so hard!"
--Random Girl to Jason, after their underage party.
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