This week on Teen Wolf, Derek, the Alpha, begins to recruit the losers and outcasts in high school to join his pack of rebel werewolves while Scott tries to stop him. Allison begins her training to become Katniss Everdeen, the girl from Brave and Legolas.
Like many horror scenes, we begin with an eerily empty gas station. Allison, dressed in the worst outfit ever, fills up her small, itty bitty car while acknowledging some stranger on a motorcycle. Then the lights turn off, leaving this almost abandoned gas station dark. It is my worst nightmare realized. But Allison is too stupid to be afraid and leaves her car. So she is kidnapped. Of course.
Cut to her chambers where Daddy Argent is also tied up. We can hear this weird Voice-Over (VO) that is from Derek, right? He talks about Allison's worst fears: what if she is bitten? Well, Allison, perhaps you shouldn't date a werewolf! Regardless, the random VO is actually clarified to be a Voice Memo; it is the beginning of Allison's training to be a hunter.
It's absolutely messed up, like this entire family, but this is kind of redeeming: "Our sons are trained to be soldiers, our daughters -- leaders." Well, if that isn't the coolest thing this show has to offer, then I don't know why I am watching. Female empowerment! But it is sort of undercut because the family forces Allison to cut her own ropes loose with an arrow. Projected escape time? Two and a half hours. That's the worst punishment I can think of my parents projecting onto me at that age.
No grandpa this week, but we do get to spend time with Mommy Dearest, who is as creepy as the nickname I've designated for her suggests. Of all the Argents on this show, the mother freaks me out the most, even if the show gives more screen time to Kate and Grandfather thus far. Maybe it's because last week she tortured the principal, or maybe because this week she stabbed herself in the arm so she could have a legitimate excuse to talk to Scott's mother. Talk about a psychopath.
By the way, not sure how I feel about the opening credits too much. It's like a weird Big Love meets The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo mash-up meets something else. I know Teen Wolf is MTV's shining hope for scripted dramas and thus amps up the show, but I do not know how to react to it exactly. Then again, I get really excited when any show has opening credits these days, so woot woot.
Essentially, this episode is a continuation of Derek's efforts to recruit so he can become a more powerful Alpha; to do so, he must build an army. I want some fan art of Derek, wolfed-out, maybe, on a modified iconic Army poster. Speaking of, I'm not sure who is better at recruitment, Derek or the military, but Derek wins in recruitment tactics ... Ahem. Back to the main point.
Despite the decline of physical education in this country, Beacon Hills High has a rock climbing day in gym class. Here we are introduced to the disheveled, acne-prone loser with epilepsy (I say that she is a loser not because she has epilepsy, but because her peers deem her as such; kids are cruel). Erica, being a proud idiot, returns to the wall to climb sans rope and has a seizure; luckily, Scott senses this, catches her and she is on her merry way to the hospital.
At the hospital, Derek continues to bring that weird sexy/creepy thing he has going for him when he just kidnaps her down into the morgue. Really, all he needs is to be sexy for him to get girls to fall in line. Come to think of it, boys too (I can't be the only one who has noticed his tension with the other guys, amirite?).
Erica arrives the next day, no longer looking like a walking corpse because she found some Proactiv and a hairbrush. Oh, and she's a werewolf now. Duh. Because once you become a werewolf, you become hot. Not hairy or dog-smelling. Just supernaturally hot; and damaged, of course, because Erica's sad story is that bullies drove her to this desperate behavior. Derek's collecting and recruiting new werewolves: Isaac and Erica. So who's next?
Well, not Jackson. It appears Lydia somehow made Jackson immune to lycanthropy, or the scratch he had last season healed and now he can no longer get it.
Why Not an Ice Rink?
Alright, I can't exactly remember why the show ends up at the ice rink because I'm too focused on noticing the lack of shirtless Stiles on my screen. Show: Why does the locker obscure shirtless Stiles from my screen? That's a part of the show: nakedness. It gives a textured, campy feel and it makes me look forward to tuning in. Sigh. But you know, why not?
Whatever happens in this 30 second scene must be important because next thing I know, clothed Stiles and this fellow named Boyd are haggling for the keys to a Zamboni. Later, Allison, Lydia, Stiles and Scott sneak in to go ice skating. Stiles is rather cute as he attempts to woo Lydia still. Personally, I do not see why she won't date him; he's oddly perfect for her.
Then again, Lydia is rather odd. In addition to being brilliant, a talented skater/bowler/athlete, she's also not exactly sane? (Theory: or even human?) Lydia hallucinates the original Alpha (Derek's uncle) in school, at the rink. And then it's brushed under the carpet until next week...
Because Derek still needs to recruit the rest of his army, Boyd is the final one given the choice. Lonely and isolated at school, Derek uses these reasons to prey on Boyd. Luckily for him, he has Scott to take responsibility. Derek lets the hound dogs out on Scott, and Scott fights back. This is all happening on the ice rink, because why not?
Scott easily defeats the newbies before Derek, the Alpha, kicks the crap out of Scott. Scott tries his best to discourage Boyd from joining Team Werewolf, but Boyd says he wants to be like Scott and that he has already been bitten. Does that mean that if loyalties shift, Scott can become an Alpha in his own right?
The Vet, who is featured briefly this week, is back. Good. Since Scott already got a promotion, I wonder what are they going to talk about? Maybe the Vet will answer all of my questions.