Madonna vs. Elton John
This rivalry is weird to me because I honestly would have expected these two to be friends. That may sound like either a homophobic jab at Elton John or a "they-both-look-like-cross-dressing-men" shot at Madonna -- but I assure you it's (mostly) neither. I'm referring somewhat to their pop music success and more so to their somehow mutual British accent. Makes sense for Sir Elton, but not so much for Madonna.
Anyway, Elton recently called Madge a "fairground stripper" among more unprintable things. I'm not entirely sure how the long-running beef originated, but don't expect either of these divas to back down at this point.
Joan Rivers vs. Costco
Costco is a fantastic place full of magical wonders and bulk toilet paper. One thing they don't want to carry anymore (apparently) is Joan Rivers's book, I Hate Everyone Starting with Me. Specifically, the Los Angeles Costco was not in love with the racy jokes on the back cover of the book. In protest to the perceived slight, Rivers handcuffed herself to a shopping cart at the wholesale giant. She then proceeded to compare Costco to Nazi Germany via her bullhorn. By all accounts, it was pretty funny and a great marketing ploy -- but someone needs to remind Ms. Rivers that Nazi Germany did not have such affordable palates of Snapple.
Randy Travis vs. The Cops
Not sure if you've heard, but Randy Travis likes to drink. A lot. Travis was arrested for a second time in Texas THIS YEAR already, where he previously was cited for public intoxication. This time he one-upped himself -- Travis crashed his Trans Am and was taken in for DUI. What was he wearing, you ask? Good question -- nothing. For some reason he decided this joyride was clothing optional. But that's not even the bad part of this story -- Travis then proceeded to threaten to shoot and kill the officers who arrested him. Next stop, prison. At least this ought to make for a really good country song.
Kathie Lee Gifford vs. The Fans
Kathie Lee is getting quite a bit of negative feedback for a quote run in Family Circle magazine, where she says: "I'm not a perfect mom, but my kids haven't been arrested, in rehab, or kicked out of school, so I must be doing something right!"
The blowback is based on the assumption that Mrs. Frank Gifford was implying that people with those on their record come from bad parenting. Look -- I'm the first one to say Kathie Lee has nothing to offer society -- but her quote was not bad at all, and people reacting negatively are reaching. She was being self-reflective, obviously answering a question, and is proud of her kids. That's probably exactly how most of our moms would handle it without being TOO self-congratulatory. So lay off her for this one, and pile on for the 9am drinking.