Spend the entire week hiding the back-to-school-sale fliers from your kids? Here's what you missed on TV.
There's Heartthrobs For Everyone
News coverage of the successful landing of the Mars rover Curiosity has resulted not only in some spellbinding color photos of the red planet's surface, but an unlikely pair of scientific heartthrobs. "Mohawk Guy" Bobak Ferdowsi and "Elvis Guy" Adam Steltzner were the stars of the live coverage of the Jet Propulsion Laboratory, and have since been making all the media rounds. My science-nerd heart still belongs to Dr. Mayim Bialik, who when she isn't co-starring on The Big Bang Theory is a real-life neurobiologist.
Going Against the Family
On the modern western Longmire (season 1/episode 9), while Sheriff Longmire (Robert Taylor) is untangling the mysterious death of the president of the Cheyenne tribal council and his ties to an illegal poker game, he's hit with an unwelcome distraction: learning that his daughter Cady (Cassidy Freeman) has been having an affair with Branch (Bailey Chase), the ambitious deputy who's gunning for Longmire's job. I realize the pickings are slim in rural Wyoming, Cady, but show a little respect, will ya?
Oh, Like Any Of Us Could Do Better
On Monday, German diver Stephan Feck was competing in the Men's 3-Meter Springboard competition in the Olympics when he won a singular honor: instant infamy as the most embarrassed Olympian of 2012. Losing his grip on his left leg as he went into his somersault, Feck lost complete control of his dive and landed flat on his back in the pool. Only his pride was hurt, but you just can't help but cringe at the sight.
A Cop-Out Before A Cop's Out
On the next to last episode of The Closer, the extended "Who is the division's mole?" arc was wrapped up too quickly. After teasing for ages that it had to be someone on the inside, the source turned out to be... Gabriel (Corey Reynolds)! No, wait, that would have actually been interesting. Turns out it was Gabriel's lawyer girlfriend Ann (Shanti Lowry), who had been hired by sleazy lawyer Peter Goldman (Curtis Armstrong) to become Gabriel's girlfriend to gather information pertaining to Terrell Baylor case. What a lame, out-of-nowhere attempt at a twist.
We're All Getting So Old
On Bunheads, Michelle (Sutton Foster) had a fling with a theater director (Chris Eigeman), partially at the urging of her free-spirited mother-in-law Fanny (Kelly Bishop). Sleeping with someone new led Michelle to realize that she hadn't processed her newlywed husband's death in the ensuing months. And it made me realize, "Wow, Chris Eigeman is starting to look kinda old." Then I realized that the movie Metropolitan, which was the first thing I ever saw him in, came out 22 years ago. Then I just got depressed.